If you, dear reader, are anything like the national media, you have spent the baseball offseason basking in the glow of the Jamey Carroll trade and lamenting that the Euclid corridor project will wreak havoc on the World Series parade route, all while not giving the Detroit Tigers a second thought.
Nevertheless, somebody has to finish second to the Tribe this year, and that team could possibly be the Detroit Tigers. Given that nobody has written a word about the Tigers since the Indians swept them into oblivion last September, I decided to check up on the Motor City Kitties to see how they are looking heading into the 2008 campaign.
CATCHER
Ivan "Pudge" Rodriguez returns for another season in Detroit. The only thing shrinking faster than his body is his on-base percentage, thanks in large part to the fact that in 2007, he walked almost as often as Stephen Hawking. In fact, Rodriguez nearly hit into twice as many double plays (16) as he had walks (9). He's like Vlad Guerrero without the power or batting average or RBIs. He is still agile behind the plate though, thanks to the rapid weight loss achieved through a demanding regimen of cold-turkey steroid abstinence.
BEFORE
Pudge Rodriguez passionately locking lips with Venezuelan peasant-burner Ugueth Urbina during the 2003 World Series.
AFTER
"Pudge" Rodriguez as he appears on his 2008 Topps baseball card.
INFIELD
The Tigers' opening day first baseman will be their shortstop, Carlos Guillen. You may remember that the Indians once traded Omar Vizquel for Guillen, before Vizquel's failed physical derailed the deal as if it involved a defensive lineman being traded to the Bengals. (In hindsight, it is a good thing that the trade did not go through, as it would have saddled the Indians with a power-hitting shortstop who is a butcher in the field.)
Since the Tigers had to correct that defensive flaw by moving Guillen to first base, the shortstop role will be filled by Edgar Renteria, who has thrived at AAAA, but was a monumental bust during his one season in the big leagues with Boston. After two more years of seasoning in the National League, the Tigers are hopeful that Renteria can contribute at the major league level.
Third base will belong to newly acquired All-Star Miguel Cabrera, whose ability to rake (as in "with the bat") is only exceeded by his ability to shovel (as in "at the buffet.") Worries that Cabrera's performance might not carry over to Detroit are unfounded, as the Marlins' 2003 World Series run has already proven that Cabrera does not wilt under the pressure of playing before hordes of glory-seeking bandwagon fans who suddenly pack previously-barren stadiums.
Second base will be held down by opera star Placido Polanco, who got a better contract from the Tigers than Billy Crystal did from the Yankees.
OUTFIELD
The Tigers outfield will be anchored by hot free agent signing Jacque Jones, who hit 5 HRs in 466 at-bats for the Cubs last season. He will hit warning track fly balls primarily against right-handed starters. His platoon-mate in left will most likely be Marcus Thames (269 AB, .242, 18 HR, 72 Ks), whose unique blend of bad defense, awe-inspiring power, low batting average, and mind-boggling strikeout rate has earned him the nickname "The Black Russell Branyan."
Center field will be patrolled by speedy Curtis Granderson. Whether it's tracking down a gapper in Comerica Park's spacious outfield, burning up the base paths to turn a double into a triple, or heading back to the dugout after making yet another out against a left-handed pitcher, Granderson does it with the speed of an over-caffeinated gazelle. Against right-handed pitchers (.337/.393/.621), Granderson is almost Ruthian. Againt left-handed pitchers (.160/.225/.269), Granderson is almost Rouse-ian. As many American League teams begin to adjust to the scouting reports, look for right- handed pitchers to begin underhand tossing with their left hand to turn Granderson into an easy out.
Right fielder Magglio Ordonez had a magical season in 2007. At the age of 33, he posted an on-base plus slugging that was 67% better than the league average. His stat line was .363/.434/.595 with 28 HRs and 139 RBI. It was by far the best season of his career. It will be interesting to see the numbers that Ordonez will put up in 2008 after crashing back to this planet:
DESIGNATED HITTER
Gary Sheffield is once again expected to have a monster year with his mouth. In 2007, he put up typical numbers for Sheffield, generating 2669265926982 news stories for his series of statements and counter-statements and mis-statements and re-statements regarding former Yankee manager Joe Torre, which can be summarized thusly:
Joe Torre is NOT a racist-- he just treats men differently because of the color of their skin, and black players get treated the worst, but not in a racist way.
It will be hard for Sheffield to top that in 2008, but never count him out, especially in a year when both an African-American and a woman are vying for the White House. This could be the year that Sheff takes his pogo stick to the political minefield.
STARTING PITCHING
The ace of the Detroit rotation is young Justin Verlander, who put up some gaudy numbers in 2007. For example, he was 1-3 with an 8.13 ERA in five starts against the Indians.
Tiger ace Justin Verlander, as seen through the eyes of Cleveland Indians hitters.
Jeremy Bonderman and Nate Robertson will once again return to the rotation to ensure that the bullpen gets lots of work. Lefty Dontrelle Willis was acquired in an off-season trade and signed to a lucrative new contract, despite the fact that his walk rate has increased and his strikeout rate has decreased in each of the last three years while pitching to six-man National League lineups. Using the latest available conversion rate, Willis' 2007 NL ERA of 5.17 equals an AL ERA of approximately 74.92. He'll throw a lot of long innings though.
And of course, 43-year-old Kenny Rogers will once again be the sagacious, graybeard veteran of the pitching staff. When runners are on base, he will tell young pitchers, "You gotta know when to hold 'em." He will also instruct them on how to "know when to walk a guy / so there's no homerun." He will also scuff the baseball and attack camera men, earning him the nickname "The White Albert Belle."
Kenny Rogers, the graybeard veteran of the Tigers' staff, pictured moments before attacking the helpless soul who snapped this photo.
BULLPEN
Joel Zumaya and Francisco Rodney are battling injuries again. Todd Jones is closing again. You get the picture.
The only thing that the bullpen has going for them this year is the extra warm-up tosses they'll get when the grounds crew has to clean up after every mound visit from manager Jim Leyland.
Close-up photo of the Jacobs Field pitchers mound after Tigers manager Jim Leyland came out to speak to closer Todd Jones during a five-run blown save on June 1, 2007.
CONCLUSION
While the national media has largely ignored the Tigers, closer inspection reveals that Leyland's squad has just as good a shot as the White Sox or Twins of finishing second to the Indians in the 2008 AL Central race. Owner Mike Illitch has increased the payroll to approximately $130 million. That may seem like a lot of money, but Illitch is not trying to buy a championship for himself. He's been there and done that with the pre-salary cap Red Wings. Rather, the civic-minded Illitch is trying to buy a championship to resuscitate the Detroit economy. If past celebrations in downtown Detroit are anything to go by, there will be plenty of insurance checks that could possibly be spent on GM products.
Motor City denizens celebrate the Detroit Shock's 2006 WNBA title.
Unfortunately, fans don't hold riots for second place finishes. But then again, it's Detroit. And there's optimism in the air. Anything is possible.
Except, of course, for the 2008 AL Central title.
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